The Marines have landed [on my house].

Since it's Monday and all, I think I will list some random coolness:

• My better half got our American and Marine Corps flags mounted on the front of our house yesterday. Complete with solar powered lights (which work nicely and look sweet. The icing on the cake was.... I love to watch him work! We're sure to get lots of attention as I think we're the only Marine family within at least a 10 mile radius. Oohrah.

• He also pulled down the putrid awnings from the front and side doors and helped the 9 year old resident plant a nice garden. I can't wait to see if the pumpkin, in particular, grows!

• I've had the nicest, most helpful correspondence from FelineFido on Etsy about some of my products. She ordered some and likes them. She gave me great feedback and even some tips. She's got to be the nicest person I've never met and I'm excited to order Tyler Hansbrough __________'s collar very soon.

• I'm slowly but surely learning to use my MacBook. It's still far more savvy than I'll ever be, but it's good to aim high.

• Spring seems to have finally sprung here and, along with it, my mood. I'm definitely a winter depressed/summer happy kind of girl. So bring on the joy and relaxation. Or.... at least the joy!

• Last but not least: to girlfriend in the Apple Bottom jeans/boots with the fur........ this one's for you, homeslice.

McRebound.

So, did you watch Grey's Anatomy last night? So many good quips-- so little time. If you can't find the entertainment value in this show, then I submit that your credibility is seriously in question. Set aside the moral implications of some of its content and the rumors and scandals running rampant among the cast members-- this show is funny. I loved the part last night when Addison (Kate Walsh) asked Miranda (Chandra Wilson) about Derek (Patrick Dempsey)'s new lady friend in a not-so-complimentary way... when she was standing right there. That was almost as good as when Meredith (Ellen Pompeo) more or less referred to herself and her friends as fickle sluts. Can't beat that dialog with a stick!

Speaking of sticks, I wanted to beat myself with one yesterday afternoon. I finally.... as perhaps the last human on the planet to do so.... installed the Mozilla Firefox web browser. Now, I don't know if it's just my finicky PC or if I'm just slow on the uptake: but this bad boy is working WAY FASTER for me than Internet Explorer ever has. I haven't had a chance to play with all of its little gizmos yet, but I realized right off the bat that it needed to be my default browser. I recall an old friend of mine (she's not old-- I've just known her awhile!), Alison, talking about Firefox ages ago. And given how much swifter she is than I am about such things, one wonders why I didn't investigate sooner. And as it happens, I only ended up with this utility as a result of downloading a bundle of stuff from Google. I am, as ever, an accidental success!

And, speaking of success, I am hoping upon hope that today will be the day that I either figure out how to make my camera take decent close-ups or that I will get my hands on a better camera (hint, hint to my dear, beloved, gorgeous hunk of a spouse!) so that I can take pictures and list the dozen or so new things I've made for Etsy. One, in particular, was requested as a trade from another seller. That's fun. See the picture below.... Psych. ;) Maybe later if fortune smiles on me today.

A big, fat, liquored up TGIF!

Signed,

McDufus

No, she (and she and she) didn't!

So I'm only partially making good on my plan to throw out some buzz about hard charging military spouses. This is only due to the fact that as a hard charger, myself, I am pressed for time today! Thanks to my naughty children, the arrival of my new postage scale (yippee!), a list of phone calls to return and two foolish hours spent tweaking the store layout, I have about 10 minutes for blogging today.

This short list of mil-divas was blatantly snatched from MilSpouse.com. They were mentioned among the 2007 Who's Who of Military Spouses. You go, ladies!!

• Tanya Biank: (Army Wife) Author of Army Wives: The Unwritten Code of Military Marriage (basis for the Lifetime TV series “Army Wives”
• Jacey Eckhart: (Navy Wife) Author, The Homefront Club: The Hardheaded Woman’s Guide to Raising a Military Family; narrator of award-winning deployment CD “These Boots”
• Sue Hoppin: (Air Force Wife) Deputy Director for Spouse Outreach Benefits Information Department, Military Officers Association of America
• Roxanne Reed: (Marine Corps Wife) Chief Executive Officer, All Fired Up Candle Company® and Jane Wayne Gear.®
  

Way to go, ladies!

Marine spouses, hear this: Roxanne was the only one listed from our specific ranks. We need to do something about this!!! True, they were mostly army wives and the army is much larger, but hasn't the USMC always done more with less? Why should the Corps' "better half" be any different?

A hiccup I had to share.

I was all set to post some scoop about an awesome military spouse who started a kick-a$$ business and represents us quite well. She will be the first of many to get shout outs from yours truly. However, I came across this bulletin on MySpace and in light of my recent desire to shed positive light on military spouses, felt obliged to share it. I can't credit the source, I can only thank Tori for posting it and thank whomever passed it along to her. Hey, ladies: you are loved.

Dear Military Wife,

I am an American woman that has no idea what is going on in the military other than what I hear on the news. I have never had to let go of someone so that they could go fight for people that they didn't know, people that sometimes do not appreciate or understand what they are fighting for. I have never had a sleepless night of worry because of a report that another bomb has exploded and I still haven't heard from my husband. I have never had to wait for months on end to hold the one that I loved so. I have never had to tell my children that daddy wasn't coming home tonight because he was so far away fighting for something that they aren't yet old enough to understand. I have never had to hold my head high and suppress the tears as I hear that it will be at least another six months of separation before my loved one gets to come home. I have never had to deal with a holiday away from the one that I thought I would share every day of my life with. And I have never had to feel the panic rising in my heart at the sound of a ringing phone or knock at the door for fear that it is the news that everyone is terrified of getting. For the reasons listed above, I can not tell you that I understand how you feel. I can not tell you that you must be strong. I can not say that you shouldn't be angry, because you "knew what you were getting into when you married a military man". I can not say these things because I have never had to walk in your shoes. What I can say for certain is that because of your unselfish acts of bravery and your husbands willingness to stand up for those who see him as "just another soldier" - - I will never have to walk in your shoes. I do understand that as a military wife you are expected to uphold a certain amount of control, but I never understood how you could do it, until now. I have figured out that you are not like other women. You are of a special breed. You have a strength within you that holds life together in the darkest of hours, a strength of which I will never possess. The faith you have is what makes you stand out in a crowd; it makes you glow with emotion and swell with pride at the mention of The United States of America. You are a special lady, a wonderful partner and a glorious American. I have more respect for your husband than I could ever tell you, but until recently I never thought much about those that the soldier leaves at home during deployment. Until this moment I could never put into words exactly what America meant to me. Until this moment, I had no real reason to.... Until I heard of you. Your husband and his military family hold this nation close, safe from those who wish to hurt us...but you and those like you are the backbone of the American family. You keep the wheels in motion and the hearts alive while most would just break completely down. Military families make this nation what it is today. You give us all hope and you emit a warming light at the end of a long dark tunnel. Because of you and your family...I am able to be me. I am able to have my family. I am able to walk free in this great land. Because of you and your family, I can look ahead to the future with the knowledge that life is going to be okay. Because of you and your family, I can awake to a new day, everyday. I realize that you are a stronger person than I will ever be because of these things and I just wanted to take the time today to say thank you to you and your family for allowing me that freedom. I will never be able to repay this debt to you, as it is unmatchable. However, I hope that you know that no matter where you are... what you are doing... what has happened today... or what will happen tomorrow... Your husband will NEVER be "just another soldier" to me.... And you, dear sweet lady, will never be forgotten. You are all in my prayers everyday and I pray that God will bring you back together with your loved one safely.

That's good stuff.

Image Facelift?

It's hard to know exactly what others' perception is sometimes. We all have our own biases that come from our opinions, our social and economic status, our personal value systems, etc. We can attempt to look at ourselves objectively but never truly do so-- so we can't ever fully know how we as individuals or as a group of associated people appears to the outside world. We can guess, but we can't be sure.

My own values, biases, interactions and speculation lead me to some conclusions about what the outside world (in this case, civilians who would be like us but have no personal affiliation with the military) thinks of military families. Of military spouses in particular. I think the following stereotypes may apply depending on who you ask:

• Military spouses are part of the bedrock of a society that values freedom and democracy. (Thank you, veterans and patriots!).

• Military spouses (and their active duty partners) are ignorant and have no idea that they could do better things if they were better informed.
• Military spouses only care about the military. They have nothing else to offer to the social melting pot in America.
• Military spouses are usually republican war mongers. They were usually raised by like minded republican war mongers.
• Military spouses are too impressionable to even form their own beliefs and opinions: they are influenced by people of stronger conviction.
• Military spouses are all stay at home moms and most have a gaggle of undisciplined children who will later join one of the armed forces.

Obviously there are more positives out there than the one I listed. But there are lots of negatives that we are stereotyped with. It chaps my behind. After all, I fancy myself being quite independent of mind and if you ask my husband, he'll tell you I'm smarter than he is (although I disagree!). True, my father is a Vietnam vet (USAF-- enlisted voluntarily, thank-you-very-much) who detests Jane Fonda and usually votes republican. But that is something I am proud of, not something I feel has earmarked me for right wing extremism. I don't agree with everything my parents believe. And, take my mother: a woman who started following the Grateful Dead when no one was still was. Needless to say, they divorced when I was very small. Factoring in the significant differences in my parents' values, a sufficient amount of my own brain power and various social interactions over the years, and I have been able to develop into an actual person with her own beliefs and priorities in life.

One thing I strive for and pride myself at doing consistently is to maintain my own individuality while being a very proud military spouse. I don't sit around waving the flag all day-- although I can list countless worse ways to spend one's time. But I have two great kids, friends, a very nice resume, recently initiated undergraduate studies, volunteer experience, and, dammit, a nice house and car, too. All of which I have achieved without my mama or my daddy's help (unless you count conception, bankrolling, general guidance and love over the years!). My name is on our mortgage right next to my husband's. I have a 401K account in my very own little name. I can argue my husband in circles for hours regarding the issue of immigration (one of the few major issues we tend to disagree on). I have some web sites and some piddly little stores that I'm doing just because they are fun and I hope to do some good along the way-- always. And I know I am not alone. I know there are thousands of other military spouses like me out there. Many are more educated, even smarter and have accomplished even more than I have in ways that are independent of their husbands (and wives, where applicable).

Based on the above negative stereotypes, though-- which I know are not the ONLY opinions out there-- I think we need an extreme makeover as a group. I'm not sure how to go about that and I'm fairly sure that I care far more than anyone outside our circle does. But it's on my mind. Maybe I will do some research and try to shine a light on some of the movers and shakers in our midst. Yeah, I think that's worth doing. Stand by.