Why am I SUCH a Marine's wife??

I've been thinking a lot about this lately.  The fact that my husband is a Marine is one of the least remarkable details about me as a person.  It's certainly important and something I'm proud of, but it's not my most defining characteristic by any means.  So, why is it that when communicating online this seems to be of the utmost importance?

I think I've figured it out.

I seek out other Marines' loved ones because I don't have good contacts with them in the real world right now.  We are settled into an urban area with no Marine Corps presence to speak of.  Around here when I speak of my husband's EAS or give "AMOI" as his job description or complain about the lack of a commissary, I might as well be speaking a foreign language.   Not one person in my immediate environment has been through a deployment or has any concept of what a drill instructor does. 

So, online, I seek out the friends that I'm missing here.  The ones who "get" this portion of our life. 

But, in the meantime, I'm still an enthusiastic UNC Tarheels basketball fan.  I'm still an avid coffee drinker and Ikea shopper.  I still have my favorite books and TV series.  I make jewelry.  I've got my college studies, part-time job, family and home.  So I suppose it's OK for me to be a big old "Marine Wife" online.  Because I've got that, too.  ;)

How to annoy your friends, family or coworkers.

Just a few guidelines.  Some of which have been around awhile and some that are my own brainchildren.

 

• Make a daily announcement of the "Word of the Day."  UrbanDictionary.com is a good resource for material.  The word of the day is "snarkoleptic."
• Insist that they call you by your wrestling or pimp name. "That's Reverend Dr. C Ice, to you."
• Answer questions with questions.  If someone says, "What if...." you say "If your sister had a penis would she still be your sister??"
• Have a countdown to a commonplace event and announce status frequently and enthusiastically.  "Two hours 'til lunch!!!"  "Thirty minutes 'til lunch!!!'
• Reply to simple questions with complex answers.  To, "What would you like for lunch?" reply "I don't know.  Let me look into that.  A lot of issues come into play."
• Announce your support of your friend/family member/coworker's presidential candidate of choice.  Then list the numerous reasons you support him-- all of which are the contrasting attributes of the opposing candidate.
• Make known your plans to make a fort over the weekend.  Ask for volunteers to assist.
• Ask for signatures on your petition for a reunion of  J Geils Band.  (Actually, this is just a good idea.  I loved these guys).
• Correct everyone's grammar.... incorrectly.  "It's not 'she does,' it's she DO."
• Enthusiastically pass out copies of your fruitcake recipe.
• Hum.  Constantly.

The last impromptu cocktails.

I'm a bit sad today. Partly because it's gloomy and rainy outside and partly because of my neighbors getting ready to move.

We met Jill, Barry and their 4 boys right after we moved into our house a year ago. They live right next to us and they are great fun. We've spent a lot of time together, much of it unplanned and on the spur of the moment. This is easily done when you're next door neighbors. And they are only moving a couple of miles from here, so we'll still visit frequently. But last night was probably the last time we will run into each other outside and end up having cocktails and playing cards until 1:00 a.m. (on a Tuesday!). So that's kinda sad.

I guess I should focus on how nice it is to have friends like them in the first place, though. The kind who will help with your home improvement projects and laugh at your jokes. The kind who will ask you for favors knowing that you'll ask them for a favor of your own at some point. The kind who will go to a Sinead O'Connor concert with you and take your son to baseball games when they have tickets. The good kind.

How to be fabulous on a low budget.

• Marry a Marine. You'll get tons of mileage out of the Full Metal Jacket questions. You and your entire family are mythical creatures.
• Insist that everyone call you by your wrestling name. Correct them when they fail to do so.
• Employ the "bend and snap" as often as possible.
• Say "sir" and "m'am." All the time. Even when you're a grown up. This throws most people off their game.
• If you feel uncomfortable in an elevator on the sidewalk with a stranger (particularly a male), look him dead in the eye and say "Don't I know your mama?"
• Live in a neighborhood full of minivans and drive a BMW sedan. Try not to flex your handling power, though... no one likes a showoff.
• Buy when everyone else is selling... and sell when everyone else is buying.
• Send your friends cards in the mail (the actual mail) randomly. For no reason.
• Do something genuinely good for someone else that won't benefit you at all. Your intrigue rating will soar.
• Never forget how to do the Running Man. If you have to practice weekly, do it.
• Talk to retired service members. In most cases they are way cooler than you are. And you can be fab by association.
• Know what you don't know. People like to be asked genuine questions. It's engaging.
• Challenge yourself to learn something new and difficult. It's humbling.... and even humility makes you more enticing.
• Be nice to customer service people on the telephone. No one does that, so you'll achieve individuality right off the bat (and might just get what you want in the process).
• Dare to be ghetto sometimes.
• Hang out with people who are smarter than you.
• Know who your REAL friends are. The rest don't matter and will drain your fab status in no time.

Etsy Buy Handmade MarineCorpsWife

Sock Rockers, Mount Up!

The theme of the week has been the "rocking of one's socks" by a slick witted or enthusiastic friend. You could simply say "You go, girl!" but that would just be tired and boring. I prefer my girl, Lori's verbiage and, frankly, am trying to give it more mileage because she was embarrassed to have said it in the first place. What kind of friend would I be if I didn't accentuate that? Boring, that's what.

So, although the list of my own personal sock rockers--either qualified by direct or indirect sock rockage-- is long and detailed, for the sake of brevity (what? I can be brief!) I will list but a few here. I won't fail to list them in random order.

• David Horton - a high school mate of mine. Apparently an overachieving genius. Published author among many other things. About to graduate from college... again... and then go to another one? Acquainted with the likes of Doug E. Fresh and Maya Angelou. No one likes a show off, Dave.

• Merrie Haskell - another school mate. We were kicking it as far back as junior high. Wordsmith extraordinaire and brilliant (if self deprecating) science fiction writer, among other things.
  

• Kelly K (not sure if she wants her whole name on blast): Creative director and marketing manager for www.TheELearningCenter.com. She's only about a hundred light years ahead of me as far as education and credentials, but has suggested the possibility of me applying for an internship down the road when I get closer to my degree.
  

• Lori "Rock My Socks" V - If you've read my blog at all, you know who I'm talking about. She's a mover and shaker from way back. See "Sisters Are Doin' It For Themselves" for further insight. You wish you could bring yourself to hate her for her gifts... but you just can't.

Speaking of socks, I'm about a half hour behind schedule getting myself and baby girl dressed and ready to head out with Jill to run errands. She told me not to rush, but I will feel so inferior if she has two small children ready to go before I square away one! Luckily for me I am riding the wave of self-appreciation from having uploaded about a dozen new things to the Etsy shop and having sold one already.